Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
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