and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
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I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
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I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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