Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Randomize
