used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
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He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
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In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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