angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
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