I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
