you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize
