Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
