I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
