I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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