Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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