I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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