Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I need a beard to bite.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
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