hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize