I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
