we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
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