i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
