I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
worst night to have a conscience
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
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