Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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