God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I didn't notice because vodka
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
