I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina