Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize
