it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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