Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
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Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
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I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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