were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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