Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
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you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
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I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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