No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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