If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
