those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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