so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
