At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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