I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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