Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel