before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
