Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
If its not for food we ain't going out.
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