I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I need a burrito and a hug.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
