omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
How does it feel to date your dad?
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
