its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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