wakey wakey hands off snakey
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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