capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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