somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
