went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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