i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
