He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize