Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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