and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
