I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
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