Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
