it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
