Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
